Mostly Semantics

Well, what Tweaksy wants, Tweaksy gets, it would seem. Not that there was a chance in hell I was going to neglect writing up one of the most surreal concertgoing experiences of my life, but it’s nice to know we’re her go-to review, especially considering how unprofessional my reviews tend to be. The short story: last night we saw Radiohead at Nissan Pavilion in, I’m pretty sure, Burma.

So this was one of the few shows I can think of with pretty much the full extended crew - Meat and Tweaks, The Maestro and T-Chop, Vermonstrous, Caseus, Bflux, Sherpa, myself, and our special out-of-town guest (who, I just looked up, last commented as “Mayor Mark Mallory” on a rare not-me post) headed out to NoVA for Radiohead last night. We’d said leave 4:30-5, but we didn’t really hit the road until almost 5:30. Understand that months ago, when these tickets went on sale, we thought, y’know, 50 bucks is steep and Nissan Pavilion sounds far, but a mid-may sunday evening concert? Fucking RADIOHEAD? That’s going to be too beautiful to pass up. So we got ten tickets, I mean… it seemed like a good idea. But I gotta admit, I woke up (at 2pm) dreading the trip. Why wouldn’t I be excited? Because it was a goddamned monsoon out there. There were t-storm and flood warnings. I don’t know how many of you know this about me, but I hates the rain. I hates it.

So some of the crew went off to purchase supplies (emergency ponchos, galoshes, and bottled water) and we took off late through the driving rain. Tweaks’ car being burgled (and seriously, on mother’s day? fuck you, thief.) left us kind of cramped, car-wise, and Meat and Tweaks gamely ended up riding in the back of my Self Rectal eXam. Honestly, I think we all agree, bravo to Tweaks for being in good spirits throughout the whole thing - if it’d been my car I’d definitely have been much whinier. Anyway, it basically took half a day to drive to Nissan Pavilion, because really you have to take 66, which is constantly backed up.

But enough foreplay - we got there fine, and we all suited up to brave the storm. For my part, I had on one of the aforementioned emergency ponchos, which was basically the thickness of the sleeve in which your morning paper is delivered. Otherwise… a hoodie and some decent boots, was basically my rain protection plan. We tromped the 9 miles to the amphitheater, up over and in… and then sat through the last half of Liars, who I tried hard to like but ultimately wasn’t wild about. Not quite dynamic enough maybe? Maybe I’d just never really listened to them before. Whatever. We had to wait almost an hour, we think, for Radiohead to come on - but really, who could tell? It was a goddamned monsoon, for real. The rain had soaked us all completely at that point, it was totally dark and it was starting to get pretty chilly. We were also being positively inundated with some pretty irritating floodlights - but when the lights went down the roar of the crowd went up, and we belonged to Radiohead for the next two hours. I’m not the sort of person who can give you a track listing - surely somewhere out there they exist (usually CV is my go-to) - I can tell you that they in no way disappointed any of us, who, with the exception of Tweaks, were all long-time fans seeing them for the first time. As you should well recognize by this point, I’m a sucker for big pop smashes, so ‘Just’, ‘Karma Police’, and ‘Fake Plastic Trees’ were all highlights. The big tracks off “In Rainbows”, ‘Bodysnatchers’, and ‘Jigsaw Falling Into Place” were also just about perfect. In particular, when they played ‘Bodysnatchers’ right before they left the stage the first time, I just about lost my shit. I mean… first of all Radiohead is just one of my all-time favorite rainy day bands and here they were in the driving, freezing fucking rain. It just felt right in its way. Moreover, my glasses were all rainy and fogged and I had to keep my hood up all the time - it was isolating, you know. And so there I am, able to just close my eyes and lose myself in their swirl and swoop - I mean, I was already kind of chilly and whatever, and I think Radiohead is a band to which the natural movement is kind of a shiver or a jitter. Whatever - I was kind of bouncing and jumping in place spasmodically despite the mud, relenting to their songs as much as I ever do. It was magical, really, one of the best shows I’ve ever seen. Two encores later, Thom’s words hung pregnant with us - “I hope it was fucking worth it.” Indeed.

We got back to the cars (finally) and stripped to our underwear (ok, everyone but modest me). When I wondered aloud how long it would take, BFlux (who, along with Tweaks and The Maestro and Tomahawk had left before the last encore for the dry heat of the car) informed me that the Prius in front of us had been there since they got there. I think I fell asleep before we left, but I heard at some point that the rain had washed out all the routes out but one. We sat in our spot in the parking lot for more than 2 hours before we finally got moving, and in the end I wasn’t back in my bed ’til a quarter to 3. However, having made it through the day alright, I can confirm: it was totally, 100% worth it. Radiohead, they’re just that damn good. If you get a chance, I can’t think of a valid excuse not to go.

OH PS: Thom Yorke said cool beans TWICE during the concert. Unpretentious? Did he just learn it? WTF THOM YORKE!? You just blew my mind, homey.

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